Learning from every experience

I have been interacting with a person far more experienced in age and life. Owing to the person I am, I have this tendency to become very familiar from the first instant itself. And this could lead to treading into forbidden places, I had never known this before.
So, as I was working and interacting with this being, I had a few suggestions or comments in my mind that I very plainly and informally presented. The response was shocking and I have to say it shook the base of the life I am living. I came to realize through the person's response that my suggestions had treaded into a very personal space. And all the more that my intentions were highly prejudiced with me having a secret reformist agenda in my mind, coming from my prejudices and notions.

Now as I usually do.. I introspected. It took me 3-4 days and nights to find out that I did actually have this secret reformist agenda in mind or not??
Finally, as I geared up my clarified self again, I told to myself that YES, it was indeed somewhere hidden in my subconscious and that rather unpleasant experience, in disguise, helped to un-earth the motive and thereby cleansed my actions for now and future.
The lesson I learned is : every reaction, response I get from life, says something about my own self. Its in my hands to blame it onto others and escape the situation thereby preserving the Ego. And its in my hands too, to rather expand my consciousness and understand my limitations, which by understanding, just melt away.

As Swami Sukhbodhananda says : The result you get from your actions is not what you on a gross level wished.. Rather what was being thought, or feared of on the subtlest level of your consciousness..
I felt thankful to the person who by giving this shock had awaken me up from  a dream, when I never knew I had been sleeping...

Let the children be ..

Being interested in children and holistic ways of nurturing and educating kids invites me to explore very many authors, for self -education purposes.

Lately, have been reading a very gripping book by Gopika Kapoor on Spiritual Parenting. In the process of reading and understanding I have realized how parents can scar their children for life, and be oblivious to it. This book is a MUST for to-be parents in this and coming generations. I would like to share a modified excerpt of a beautiful chapter - LET THEM BE.

"What are you doing? yelled Sonya at her 3 year old daughter Ria. Ria looked up startled, her crayon frozen in her hand.

Can't you see you have to color within the lines? Silly girl! I 'll do it for you."

Ria watched her as her mother carefully filled in the outline of the picture with neat, deliberate strokes unlike the bold vibrant lines she had colored. 

Later at lunch Ria concentrated hard as she tried to bring a rice-laden spoon to her mouth without dropping any. But a few grains fell onto her frock and unfortunately for her, Sonya saw this. 

Can't you eat properly? You're always dropping things. Give it to me, I will feed you."

 Sonya filled the spoon and began shoving the rice into Ria's mouth. "There, now you won't get messy," she said. "I can't wait for her to start eating herself," she turned and said to her friend who had come over for lunch. 

But that was what I was trying to do, Mummy, thought Ria. Only you don't let me.

As parents all we do is wait. Waiting for the baby to pop out, to walk, to smile... and the waiting continues. And with waiting comes impatience. 

Children with their developing motor skills and growing minds, take their own time. And they should. Their brains are like sponge, absorbing everything they see and hear and are taught. 

And yet because we also want our children to be perfect we do things for them instead of letting them explore the world for themselves. 

Why can't we just let our children be children and enjoy their childhood? 

Childhood is one of those magical times with no responsibilities, no fears, no limitations, where creativity and imagination run riot and you can be anything you want to be. As adults we try so hard to relive this magical time. There are workshops being conducted to get in touch with your inner child, yet we are denying our children the feeling of being children. 

Let us learn to let our children - with all their spills, mistakes, and messes- BE.

kuch panktiyaan

अगरबत्ती के धुंए की तरह, कुछ यादें...

मेरे नज़दीक यूँ आयीं, और यूँ 

हवा में समा सी गयीं, के जैसे...

बस एक खुशबु सी है अभी भी यहाँ, जो एहसास दिला रही है, 

उनसे  मुखातिब होने का..

~~~

खुद से बडबडाते हुए, सालों से, 

एक चुप्पी सी सध गयी है सीने में,

अँधेरे सी तीखी, रौशनी सी तेज़, 

ना चुप रहने देती है, और ना लफ्ज़ आ पातें है कम्बखत जुबां पे,

उफ़ ये हाल-ए- तन्हाई...

~~~

चायपत्ती, इलाईची, और चीनी की मंद मंद खुशबु, 

और गुनगुनाती सर्दियों की ये धुंध भरी सुबह..

चलो कहीं तो कोई किसी अपने के लिए चाय बना रहा, लगता है..

I did not die..

Beautiful one..


Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die.

- Anonymous

For my favorite little one..

गोपाल दस नीरज ..

धर्म   है 

जिन मुश्किलों में मुस्कुराना हो मना,

उन मुश्किलों में मुस्कुराना धर्म है

जिस वक़्त गैर मुमकिन सा लगे,

उस वक़्त जीना फ़र्ज़ है इंसान का..

लाजिम लहर के साथ है तब खेलना,

जब हो समुन्दर पे नशा तूफ़ान का..

जिस वायु का दीपक बुझाना ध्येय हो,

उस वायु में दीपक जलाना धर्म है..

हो नहीं मंजिल कहीं जिस राह की,

उस राह चलना चाहिए इंसान को,

जिस दर्द से साड़ी उमर रोते कटे

वह दर्द पाना है ज़रूरी प्यार को..

जिस चाह का हस्ती मिटाना नाम है,

उस चाह पर हस्ती मिटाना धर्म है..

आदत पड़ी हो भूल जाने की जिसे,

हरदम उसी का नाम हो हर सांस पर

उस की खबर में ही सफ़र सारा कटे

जो हर नज़र से हर कदम हो बेखबर,

जिस आँख का आँखें चुराना काम हो,

उस आँख से आँखें मिलाना धर्म है..

जब हाथ से टूटे ना अपनी हथकड़ी 

तब मांग लो ताकत स्वयं ज़ंजीर से,

जिस दम ना थमती हो नयन सावन झड़ी,

उस दम हंसी ले लो किसी तस्वीर से,

जब गीत गाना गुनगुनाना जुर्म हो,

तब गीत गाना गुनगुनाना धर्म है..

हाँ फिर..

फिर से हर सहर का वो सूनापन 

फिर से उसे भुलाने की वो नाकाम कोशिशें 

पर कुछ तो नया है, 

हाँ .. कुछ तो नया है..

अब मैं अकेली नहीं, 

तू है, 

और अब तेरे ही सहारे मेरी हिम्मत

हर पल अपने को एक नयी उम्मीद से बाँध दिया करती है,

यूँ ही ज़िन्दगी से,

कभी ऐसे, तो कभी वैसे, नए सपने निचोड़ लिया करती है...

The real Rebel

We often talk about being a rebel..
I was lucky to witness a live rebel in front of me yesterday.
It was a toddler, around 1.5 or 2 yr of age traveling in the Delhi Metro with his mother and enjoying the panoramic views outside through the window. As restless as he was, there were so many facets he displayed in front of all of us in oblivion. Mom kind of pretended to be angry at him for asking so many questions and being so hyperactive. As she expressed her pretended anger through her bulging eyes, to our total surprise the kiddo smiled innocuously and showered his kisses and hugs over her, melting her so called anger all at once, and letting her an entry in to the NOW again.

A few excerpts,
Mom - Ganda bachcha hai ?
kiddo -"Mummy main ganda nahi hun, main achcha bachcha hun, aur aap bhi aachche ho.

Mom- Police ko bulaungi, token de de
Kiddo - hmm.. police ko? Bulao.. Laao mujhe phone do, main bulata hun!!

Mom- Pitai karun teri? Bhoot hai aagey, bhoot aa jayega yahan..
Kiddo- Mummy, pitayi kar do. Bhoot ki, meri nahi!!